No Kissey Kissey, We Went to Bed Mad

Spend a bit of time on Pinterest and you’ll almost always find a bedroom quote that reads “Always Kiss Me Goodnight” or maybe, “Never go to bed angry”… ohhh or even “Love conquers ALL.” So many quotes on so much ship-lap thanks to Mrs. Gaines and HGTV. Guess what – those quotes on that cute ship-lap can go jump in the creek. We went to bed angry! And you guess it, we woke the same! The Mr. seemed to give in and lose most of his immature frustration during the course of the next day; but nooo, not me. I …

Motivation

People are motivated by two things: They’re motivated by principle and pleasure, or they are motivated by pain. We create our own jail cells, where bars are made of anger, bitterness, resentment and grudges. What’s the key to all of this? Forgiveness. It’s your choice. Do you want to stay where you are, in misery, or do you want to be free from this state of mind? When we’re hurting it’s only human to want to blame someone else. Quit running away from it. Face the fear. Forgive. Once you forgive, you’re given the opportunity to live an amazing life of …

In the Trenches of Grief

      I recently lost a cousin of mine to suicide. As you can imagine it was a complete shock not only to his immediate family, but everyone who was ever blessed with his presence. He was a warm-hearted person with a lively spirit. Anyone you ask would say he always had a smile on his face and was a very happy-go-lucky kind of guy. When I first heard of the way he passed, my heart instantly broke! I knew all too well the pain they were feeling. Twelve years ago, I lost my dad to suicide. Twelve years …

Restored and Redeemed: A Marriage Story

Wedding rings

We all have a story to tell. I would like to think that mine is not much different than yours, but I know that it probably is. As I think about celebrating 41 years of marriage, I know there was a time that the word “celebration” would not have been a part of my vocabulary in speaking about my life with my sweet, precious, ever patient husband. God knew when I married this man that my relationship with him would be filled with so many ups and downs, so many trials, but also so many joys….and He knew that this …

His Faithfulness Remains

I have had the unfortunate opportunity to endure not one, but two, exceptionally difficult ministry experiences. The first one involved me directly while I was working on a small ministry team at a large church. The details aren’t important, but it devastated me at the time. It didn’t change my view of who God was, but it was disheartening to see a ministry leader behave in very ungodly ways that were destructive to me and many others. Eventually I healed, but I didn’t realize that first event was preparing me for things to come. The next ministry falling out also …

God of Comfort

    God is the ultimate Comforter. No matter what we face in this life, He fully understands. Isn’t that a comfort in and of itself? In a world where we feel so misunderstood, the God of the Universe understands us, in and out, through and through. When my firstborn, eighteen-year-old, son passed away in a car accident, I was beyond desperate to find anyone who could understand my pain. Thankfully, some caring mutual friends linked me up with some other mammas who were walking out the unimaginable journey of child loss. God had comforted these woman, just as He …

Hopeless to Whole

  On January 17, 2014, life was jolted into a warp speed spiral out of control. Things had been bad before, but not like this. After years of exhausting relationships and funds there was no where left to turn. The friend I was staying with could no longer give me a place to stay so I was homeless. I was at the end of my rope and didn’t want any part of this life here on earth anymore. With the heavily persuasive opinion of a long-time friend I admitted myself to a mental hospital. I arrived with the previous diagnosis …

A Season of Death and Dying

I stand, lost in the sight before me.  I am looking through the window completely raptured in the thoughts racing through my mind.  As I watch leaves fall to the ground I can feel the cool air radiating through the glass.  One by one, the leaves fall and I notice the beautiful colors of orange, yellow, red and brown.  The leaves have died.  The trees are almost empty now.  I find peace in this moment.  I found comfort even surrounded by death.   Summer is past, we are moving through the season of death, and dying before winter comes.  This reality …

Hidden Grief

Hey friends! I really wanted to write something light hearted today. But after praying and giving it a lot of thought, I felt strongly that God wanted me to share with you about grief, particularly “hidden” grief. Hidden grief is a deep sadness we carry with us daily. It’s buried underneath smiles, productivity, serving and even laughter, but it’s always there under the surface. It can feel as if someone has strapped a backpack full of heavy bricks onto our back. The heaviness is overwhelming at first, but eventually we become so accustomed to the weight of it that we …

What Would I Do Without Jesus!?

The best way I could share my background is to take a couple excerpts from my current memoir (see below). I always go back to the first few months of my life, because this is where God kept me in the palm of His hand.  I have no vision in my right eye, and what little I had seemed to be not working right when I was born. Born a premie, the oxygen administered after my birth ruined my retinas; I’m blessed to have a little residual vision.  The condition was “retrolental fibroplasia” (RLF), but today is known as “retinopathy …